Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
