I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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