She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I think my vagina is haunted
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize