Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
