She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
