talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
