and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
