Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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