it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I should be sponsored by Trojan
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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