garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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