But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
