$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Can Purell be used as lube?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
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