she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
