I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
