Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
time to smoke my breakfast
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
