the condom got lost in my hair
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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