Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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