a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize