I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Randomize
