That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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