Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize