allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
