Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
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