Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
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