Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
