Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
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In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
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