her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize