i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
