It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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