..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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