Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
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