are you still at the devil's house?
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
birth control should be required to get into college
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
