He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
