Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
