Small penises have feelings too.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
