K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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