ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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