Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
