Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
