North Korea, Best Korea!
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
Randomize
