It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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