They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize