I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
