you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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