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He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
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