So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
