LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
