Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
