idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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