I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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