all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
