Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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